It's takes a lot to piss me off...but when you do...F*** YOU!
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Not my normal language...so if easily offended by the F* word...see you tomorrow. Otherwise...read on!
I was in Safeway grocery shopping yesterday and I might as well have been in Hell. I was fine. But my kids were aliens and so was every-freakin'-body in the damn store! (Except one very nice elderly lady...but let me bitch first)
To the woman at the entrance door who told my six year old he was too big to ride in the fire engine shopping cart: F*** YOU!
To the woman who laughed at me when said six year old wouldn't stop fighting with his brother in said shopping cart and was kindly asked to get out and walk and then proceeded to tell me he wasn't going to listen to me and I said "Fine..start walking. I'll meet you at home." and he proceeded to stomp down the aisle dragging my friggin' shopping cart down to the point I could no longer push it: F*** YOU!
To the man who slammed my finger between my cart and his and kept walking:
F*** YOU!
To the various women who looked down their noses at me when I smacked my two year old on the butt and sat him on the floor next to the apples in the produce section for time out because he kept ramming said shopping cart into the apples and knocking them over, and into the tomatoes and knocking them over and the watermelons and almost knocking them over and my ankle knocking me over and continuously fighting and biting his brother and COMPLETELY IGNORING ME: F*** YOU!!!! You did not follow my a$$ throught the store when I was calmly breaking up said fights and arguments and tattling's etc. YOU were not at your wits end by the time you reached said produce and ready to sell you children and had I been PMSING I probably would've put your A$$ in time out too!!
To the cashier who continuously told me his migraine was coming back and how he would never have kids while my 2 year old repeated "Mommy, I want my candy! Mommy, I want my candy! Mommyiwantmycandy.
mommyiwantmycandymommyiwantmycandy" at the top of his lungs because I took it away because he bit his brother AGAIN and refused to give in while said checker boy was ringing up (very slowly, mind you, because of his incessant banter) my $300+ worth of groceries...oh...to which he said "Oh. Wow. You've got a lot of food. You're going to need another basket. You know my friends and I we just go to each other's houses and eat everyone elses food...."
Yeah? Well F*** YOU!
Funny, I managed to fit all that food AND two kids in the basket I already had...but I'll be damned I need another one. Of which, I loaded up with all that food and two kids...just switched carts! Whatever!
To the bagger who asked me at the end of this 20 minute ordeal (yes. J-man #2 screamed THE ENTIRE TIME!!) "Do you need help with your groceries Maam?": F*** YOU!!!
AND last but not least...THANK YOU to the elderly woman who restored my faith in humanity in a single comment , handed me a coffee on my way out of the store as I was near tears and said "You are one of the strongest women I have seen in a long time. What a wonderful Mom you must be. Way to go. Here's a coffee to calm your nerves, on me." and gave me a great big hug.
I was in Safeway grocery shopping yesterday and I might as well have been in Hell. I was fine. But my kids were aliens and so was every-freakin'-body in the damn store! (Except one very nice elderly lady...but let me bitch first)
To the woman at the entrance door who told my six year old he was too big to ride in the fire engine shopping cart: F*** YOU!
To the woman who laughed at me when said six year old wouldn't stop fighting with his brother in said shopping cart and was kindly asked to get out and walk and then proceeded to tell me he wasn't going to listen to me and I said "Fine..start walking. I'll meet you at home." and he proceeded to stomp down the aisle dragging my friggin' shopping cart down to the point I could no longer push it: F*** YOU!
To the man who slammed my finger between my cart and his and kept walking:
F*** YOU!
To the various women who looked down their noses at me when I smacked my two year old on the butt and sat him on the floor next to the apples in the produce section for time out because he kept ramming said shopping cart into the apples and knocking them over, and into the tomatoes and knocking them over and the watermelons and almost knocking them over and my ankle knocking me over and continuously fighting and biting his brother and COMPLETELY IGNORING ME: F*** YOU!!!! You did not follow my a$$ throught the store when I was calmly breaking up said fights and arguments and tattling's etc. YOU were not at your wits end by the time you reached said produce and ready to sell you children and had I been PMSING I probably would've put your A$$ in time out too!!
To the cashier who continuously told me his migraine was coming back and how he would never have kids while my 2 year old repeated "Mommy, I want my candy! Mommy, I want my candy! Mommyiwantmycandy.
mommyiwantmycandymommyiwantmycandy" at the top of his lungs because I took it away because he bit his brother AGAIN and refused to give in while said checker boy was ringing up (very slowly, mind you, because of his incessant banter) my $300+ worth of groceries...oh...to which he said "Oh. Wow. You've got a lot of food. You're going to need another basket. You know my friends and I we just go to each other's houses and eat everyone elses food...."
Yeah? Well F*** YOU!
Funny, I managed to fit all that food AND two kids in the basket I already had...but I'll be damned I need another one. Of which, I loaded up with all that food and two kids...just switched carts! Whatever!
To the bagger who asked me at the end of this 20 minute ordeal (yes. J-man #2 screamed THE ENTIRE TIME!!) "Do you need help with your groceries Maam?": F*** YOU!!!
AND last but not least...THANK YOU to the elderly woman who restored my faith in humanity in a single comment , handed me a coffee on my way out of the store as I was near tears and said "You are one of the strongest women I have seen in a long time. What a wonderful Mom you must be. Way to go. Here's a coffee to calm your nerves, on me." and gave me a great big hug.
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